Pete Buttigieg Is Canceled

There are a lot of reasons to dislike South Bend, IN, Mayor Pete Buttigieg: his attempt to ruin Lil Nas X, his bad policies, his opportunism…the list goes on! But he’s really done it this time:

What…the hell? Pete, my man, this is not true. Sure, both things will get you clean, but dish soap is harsh!!! Dish soap will suck the life out of your skin faster than it takes to process “BOOT EDGE EDGE” when it passes by you on a t-shirt and you wonder whether that’s actually correct. Are you a filthy dish? Have some self-respect!

My colleague Samantha Grasso really summed it up best:

An incredible, 100% accurate own. Now to be fair, the full quote makes it clear that Buttigieg is referring to hand soap, but I think the point stands. Also, let’s not kid ourselves: teenagers are extremely enviable, brilliant idiots, and they WILL take this to mean that they can wash their body with dish soap. Why don’t we fix the student debt crisis so they can buy some dang Dial without crippling anxiety??

If you can believe it, this wasn’t even the strangest thing happening with Mayor Pete today.

Alrighty then!! Stay safe out there, Pete. Iowa is fuckin weird.