Right-Wing Dipshits Accused of Being Kremlin Stooges by the DOJ Say They’re Big Dumb Babies Who Don’t Know Anything
Photo by Brett Carlsen/Getty Images
Tim Pool, famed Splinter Schmuck of the Week, and Benny Johnson, famed plagiarizer of BuzzFeed lore, work for Tenet Media, one of the many bile production plants in the right-wing media ecosystem. News that any of these sites has a shadowy billionaire benefactor is a dog bites man story, but according to the Department of Justice and independently verified by CNN, one of Tenet Media’s billionaire benefactors was allegedly the Kremlin! Payments of nearly $10 million from “investors” as part of an alleged larger Russian influence operation is what won Tenet Media the designation of “Company 1” in the indictment. I wonder what may have tipped the DOJ off.
Tim Pool hysterically banging table shouting UKRAINE IS THE ENEMY OF THIS COUNTRY
He didn’t know he was working for a company that took $10 million USD in black bag payments from Russia guys. Horrible coincidence. We’ve all been there pic.twitter.com/bGz0jHrOnD
— Drew Pavlou 🇦🇺🇺🇸🇺🇦🇹🇼 (@DrewPavlou) September 5, 2024
This is amazing. Tim Pool and Benny Johnson, two complete and utter airheads who should not matter, have commandeered massive platforms by poisoning the discourse. Their milquetoast version of right-wing dipshittery designed to grease the wheels on someone’s radicalization to the more sinister elements of the right-wing media ecosystem has been wildly successful, apparently in part due to Russian intelligence operatives, according to the Department of Justice.
Benny Johnson and Tim Pool and everyone else striving to scoop enough of their brain out of their skulls so they can float up to their monetary heights live in a world where words don’t matter. Everyone at Tenet Media and the Daily Caller and all the other doofuses running the most slapdick propaganda operation in history are born without a hippocampus and retain no memories from day to day. They wake up and lurch towards whatever new manufactured outrage their billionaire benefactors tell them to focus on. They are the literal definition of lemmings, jumping off whatever cliff they are pointed at.
But it turns out that cliff isn’t metaphorical! Tim Pool is already dealing with the consequences of this new world he finds himself in where words really do matter. Especially specific ones like “leaking” that accuse the DOJ of a crime. We are less than 24 hours out from the indictment and Pool has already had to throw himself at the mercy of prosecutors with his main defense in this entire ordeal: I’m a big dumb baby who doesn’t know anything.
corrected because I didnt know this was an official DOJ release
— Tim Pool (@Timcast) September 4, 2024
Benny Johnson also echoed Pool’s “victim” defense, asserting that he too is a big dumb baby who doesn’t know anything about that $10 million either.
A statement on the leaked DOJ indictment today:
A year ago, a media startup pitched my company to provide content as an independent contractor. Our lawyers negotiated a standard, arms length deal, which was later terminated. We are disturbed by the allegations in today’s…
— Benny Johnson (@bennyjohnson) September 4, 2024
This might be my favorite story of the year. These people are total idiots, even after grading them on the right-wing media curve, and yet they have grown their platforms and bank accounts exponentially with the laziest, most cynical garbage I have ever seen. At least you can tell that Ben Shapiro knows what he’s doing when he puts his debate club good boy schtick on for the New York Times, but Pool and Johnson are just garden variety boobs following the herd wherever it takes them, trying to echo the mouth sounds from the more articulate and thoughtful ghouls in their cohort. Now, Johnson and Pool must strenuously defend their airheaded work as their genuine babybrained thoughts, lest they face real consequences for the first time in their depraved lives.