Trump vs. Jimmy Fallon Is America's Most Pathetic Feud

President Donald Trump gets into rivalries multiple times a day because he’s a combative and immature narcissist, but his most recent rivalry might be the most pathetic one yet. And yes, it involves Jimmy Fallon.

Last week, Fallon did what post-2016 Jimmy Fallon does best—lament that, two months before the 2016 election, he ruffled the reverse-Midas situation atop Donald Trump’s head that many people refer to as “hair.” Naturally, the President of the United States of America raged on Twitter about it, firing off his famous, dubious claim that the late night host called him to report that he had “monster ratings.”

Fallon’s initial response was to make a donation to immigrant rights group RAICES in Trump’s name, which is good. But then Fallon went and addressed it on his show last night—after all, a Trump tweet is a very big get and Jimmy Kimmel talks about his Trump rivalry!—and things got weird again. In his opening monologue Fallon, called the president out:

“When I saw that Trump insulted me on Twitter, I was gonna tweet back immediately, but I thought, ‘I have more important things to do.’ Then I thought, ‘Wait – shouldn’t he have more important things to do? He’s the president! What are you doing? You’re the president! Why are you tweeting at me?’”

Haha! Fallon then went on to debunk the phone call Trump alleges he made, and further, quashed any semblance of success the show may have had in a self-own for the ages:

“By the way, Donald. I don’t know if you’ve seen my ratings the past two years — you didn’t help my ratings. But really, thanks a lot. Thanks for nothing.”

Oh. I guess the joke is on Trump because actually Fallon’s show is failing? Ha ha?