What is Melania Trump's Problem

It’s nice to know that Melania Trump and her staff can find the time to be a complete and total dick to one of the only other people who knows what it’s like to be a presidential spouse—Michelle Obama.

Speaking with ABC’s Robin Roberts on Sunday, Obama—hyping her upcoming memoir Becoming—said that when she first moved into the White House, former First Lady Laura Bush had offered herself as a friendly sounding board in the years ahead, saying, “If you need any help, I’m a phone call away.”

Obama told Roberts that she had made the same gesture of goodwill to Melania Trump. When asked if Melania had taken her up on the offer, Obama answered simply, “No.”

OK, so a nice gesture begets another nice gesture begets…well, whatever the fuck this is, from Melania’s spokeswoman Stephanie Grisham:

Grisham followed up by saying that there were no “emotions” intended in her answer.

Well, thank god Melania has a crack squad of White House insiders to help her answer the tough questions, like:

For the rest of us, though: Please do NOT offer Melania Trump any help, because she is a STRONG and INDEPENDENT woman who definitely does NOT need one of the most popular political figures in America as a friend. She’s doing just fine on her own, got it? Everything is FINE.